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Santa has been in job for 30 years in Ludhiana and is finally sick of the city life. He quits his job and buys 5 acres of land in a remote area - as far from humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise, it`s total peace and quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, Santa is finishing dinner when someone knocks on his door. He opens it and there`s a big, bearded man standing there.
"I`m your neighbor from four miles over the ridge...havin` a party Saturday...thought you`d like to come."
"Great," Santa says, "after six months of this I`m ready to meet some local folks. Thank you."
"Gotta warn you, there`s gonna be some drinkin", said the visitor.
"Not a problem..." said Santa.
As he starts to leave, the visitor stops and said, "More `n` likely gonna be some fightin` too."
"Damn!" Santa thinks, "tough crowd....Well," he says, "I get along with people. I`ll be there. Thanks again."
Once again visitor turns turns from the door. "I`ve seen some wild sex at these parties too."
"Now that is not a problem," says Santa, "Remember, I`ve been alone for six months. I`ll definitely be there! By the way...what should I wear to the party?"
The visitor stops in the door again and says, "Whatever you want...it`s just gonna be the two of us."
- Girl`s best friends After dinner and a movie, Santa drove his date, Jeeto, to a quiet country road and made his move. When Jeeto responded enthusiastically to his kissing, Santa tried sliding his hand up her blouse. Suddenly, Jeeto jerked away, got out of the car is a hurry, and ran home.
Later that night, she wrote in her diary... - Best feature ! Santa lived in an apartment building and had to walk down the hall every morning to get his mail. One morning while getting his mail, his new neighbor slinked out of her apartment towards him and as she leaned over to get her mail her robe opened a bit.
Santa could hardly beleive it, she wasn`t wearing... - Santa`s dog Three people, 2 men and Mrs Santa, Jeeto, and their dogs are in the Vets waiting room.The first man`s dog asked the second man`s dog, 'What you are here for?'
They are putting me down.'
Oh no, says the first dog, why?
The second dog says,'Well, you see... I`ve been chasing... - Don`t rush ! A plane is flying over the Bay of Bengal as Santa, the pilot, is finishing an announcement on the intercom. Putting the mike down, he hits the Off switch. Unbeknownst to him, the switch is malfunctioning and his conversation is broadcast into the passenger area.
'Take over for awhile, Kapoor,' Santa says to his co-pilot and... -
Hunting season ! Santa and his wife, Jeeto, lived aways out in the piney woods and after a few years began to have problems of a very personal nature. Not being well versed in the matters taught in school, Santa decided to consult a physician in regards to the matter.
'Doc, lots of times I get the mating urge out in the fields,' confessed Santa. 'But there`s no way to let my wife know because...